Summertime is family time
Summertime is family time
By Jeffrey D. Murrah
It has always been a fascinating observation to notice parents responding to "summertime." Some parents actually express dread at the thought of being with their children for the summer months. Such responses are unfortunate for both parents and children.
Children often sense how their parents feel about them. They sense whether or not their parents enjoy being around them, or just endure them. It is commonly accepted that people don't enjoy being where they are not wanted. Most people enjoy an emotional welcome mat that lets them know they are wanted and enjoyed.
Summertime can be enjoyable for every member of the family. It is important that the summer schedule for the family includes activities for each member of the family. Both parents and children need inclusion in the family's schedule of activities. Some of the activities may include time together or separate from the rest of the family. The schedule does need some activities that do include everyone. With families that include different age groups this can be difficult, but well worth the effort.
The summer schedule should include a balance of high-impact activities and restful activities. Schedules that do not have a balance can lead to feeling worn-out or lethargy.
Summer also provides time for the family to engage in new activities. Trying new activities puts all the members of the family on an equal footing. Activities such as camping force all the members of the family to cooperate in tasks beneficial to all. If children are old enough, include them in the planning and preparation for activities. If trips are on the agenda, try including some stops that the each member of the family enjoys. Trips that cater to only one member of the family are seen as 'boring' for the other parties.
The summer heat is a reminder that we do need to slow down. Summer allows a time for parents to enjoy their children. Summer also allows for children to enjoy and in some cases get to know their parents. Children don't expect parents to be perfect or to do everything perfect. Children do expect parents to be human and try to enjoy life.
Summer in many ways is a time to enjoy the fullness of life. Family members who don't enjoy life can make summer a burdensome time. In those situations, make offers to engage them, but don't let them burden down the whole family.
If the family budget limits the activities, it is important to be open to low-cost alternatives. Just leaving the home and visiting local attractions can make the summer more enjoyable. Children will see the efforts made, and the attempts at reaching out to them. Summer is a great time to reassure your children that you enjoy them and their company.
Jeffrey D. Murrah is a licensed marriage and family therapist with offices in Pasadena and La Porte. He can be reached at (713) 944-4335 or through his website at www.restorethefamily.com