Professional Educator, Traffic Cop, Troubleshooter, Trouble, Valuable All-Around Person
|If you see this man,
please seize him fiercely by the ankle and immediately contact the
faculty at Gardens Elementary! We didn't finish communicating to him all
the ways in which we are going to miss him!
Mr. Starck, the parking lot misses you! Mr. Lesniewski is doing the best he can, but he puts out too many cones! He is demanding white gloves and a whistle!
Mr. Starck, Mrs. Steptoe may be doomed to wear full hockey goalie gear! They have now enacted a new code, GONE FISHING, which means we're up a creek without you.
Mr. Starck, the coffee pot has gone to a new domicile already! This means that many of us are just milling around aimlessly with empty mugs, like some scene out of Outer Limits or Fahrenheit 451.
Mr. Starck, I know you will find this hard to believe, but our cerebral advantages have diminished greatly in your absence, and as new situations develop, we have actually had to read the manuals to figure out how to deal with them without you! (Did you leave us instructions somewhere?)
Mr. Starck, all the ladies in the building feel like part of the furniture now! NO ONE greets us with "Hello, young ladies!" since you've been gone.
And Mr. Starck, your witticisms, although fully appreciated only by a select few, are greatly missed! They leave a statistically significant void in the intellectual fabric of our daily existence here.
Although we are willing to share you with our country, and we know that your feet are walking where your heart has led you; although we are extremely proud of you and know that you and all the others with you will keep our country safe, warm, and strong --
WE'RE STILL MISSING YOU, MR. STARCK!
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